Monday, August 3, 2009

Maybe my son isn't really a vampire

A while ago, my husband told CJ that when he achieved the rank of Life Scout in the Boy Scouts that he would get him a pizza from this place.

This wouldn't be just any pizza, this would be his very own pizza to share...............or not.

Now, if you've ever had pizza from this particular establishment, you will know how incredibly filling it is. Their pizza is delicious and has more cheese on it than a pizza should be allowed to have.
Seriously, DO NOT order extra cheese.

A few weeks ago, CJ fulfilled all the requirements to become a Life Scout and so late on a Saturday night, his dad took him to get his pizza.
The cool thing about this pizza place is that it has live streaming video to the internet, so you can see the people eating in the restaurant. Knowing this, we pulled up their website and watched them buy the pizza. We even called them on the cell phone and told CJ to dance around in front of the camera and pull faces.

And he did just that.

I also need to mention that it was late enough that nobody else was really there. (Nobody except the hundreds of strange people that who probably like to stay up late on a Saturday night to watch a live video from a pizza place)
They brought the pizza home, and contrary to what CJ had originally planned, he shared some of it.
1/2 slice for Dad.
1/2 slice for Aaron
1/2 slice for Max.
Then CJ started to eat the rest of the pizza. This was a large pizza and he enjoyed each piece.
Now, I do need to mention that I can only eat 1 to 1-1/2 slices of this pizza before becoming uncomfortably full. This pizza is very rich, and very filling.
When he had eaten all but 3 slices of the pizza, I asked him if he was going to save the rest for breakfast the next morning, and he said,
"No, I'm eating the WHOLE THING!"

And he did.

I couldn't believe he at the whole thing.

Well, maybe I could, he eats a lot, and he eats fast. What I really couldn't believe was that he wasn't at all sick. If I manage to eat two slices, I get an upset stomach.

The next morning when CJ woke up he came into the kitchen, said hi and stood next to me. The garlic smell nearly knocked me over.
Then he spoke and I got a whif of his breath.
The garlic wasn't just his breath, it was coming out of his skin. Even his eyelashes smelled like garlic.
The kid really smelled bad. You could almost see the garlic fog following him everywhere he went.

And so what did he do? Probably what any normal 13 year old garlic infested kid would do. He followed us around and BREATHED ON US!

The really bad thing was that now we needed to take this kid to church with us.
We wouldn't let him sit with us, we made him sit on the row in front of us. I felt kind of bad for the people sitting in front of him, but hey, we didn't have to smell him.

While at church, he breathed on a few of his friends.
One of them said "EEWWWW! SICK!"

You have to know it was bad at that point, because it takes something really bad to gross out a 13 year old boy.

Does anyone care to guess how long he smelled like this?

Three days. It took three days for the smell of that pizza to wear off. His room even smelled of garlic, until I made him open the window and air it out.

And he thought all this was funny.

Now he can't wait until he does something else worthy of earning another pizza all to himself.


Kristina P. said...

The Pie has only made me fat, not smell like garlic for three days!

Busty LaRue said...

Late night pizza runs at the Pie are some of my favorite memories of college (okay, the only ones! haha). I can't believe he ate that much....or that the garlic smell grossed his friends out. CRAZY! Glad it finally went away, I can't imagine how bad that was for all of you!

LisAway said...

It's probably much less expensive and more convenient to just do what my husband does to get the same effect: eat a clove or three of garlic raw.

To his credit (since he loves it) he only does this when he's sick or getting sick as the Eastern European part of him tells him that raw onion and garlic are the recipe for a quick recovery. He makes a tomato or egg salad with tons of onion and garlic. And it is very hard to sleep in the same room as him.

If we lived where you do, I'd take him for some of that pizza when he starts getting sick with pleasure. :)

Mum-me said...

I thought when 13 year olds said "EWWWWW. SICK!" it was meant as a compliment.

My cousin eats so much garlic he smells like that all the time.

Suburban Correspondent said...

Once we had to take Susie to church right after she mistook the jar of VapoRub for Mommy's hand cream. There wasn't a clogged sinus for a 3-row radius.

Tonya said...

LOL I know about that garlic smell. One time I baked chicken with onions and garlic. Well, I ate a whole head of roasted garlic all by myself, I LOVE garlic. My poor dh had to sleep in the same bed with me for the 3 or 4 days it took for the smell to go away. The smell really does come out of your pores.

utmomof 5 said...

EEEWWW! I think I would have to make my garlic smelling kid sleep outside :) Way to go on getting his life! My 13 year old is just starting his Eagle project, heaven help me!!!

Jen said...

Bahahahaha. Definitely not a vampire. Now if he becomes a vampire-slayer, he'll know what to eat all the time. He can just breathe on them and they'll wilt.

Melanie J said...

Holy cow. That sounds brutal.

Melissa said...

I can't wait to have teenage boys... okay, that's a lie. I am not looking forward to that stage of life AT ALL :)

Chief said...

OK so I sat here with my jaw on my keyboard! He ate almost a whole PIE Pizza? I am aghast! I wonder if my 13 year old adolescent could do the same? Have mercy on his colon!

This reminds me of when we made poptarts right before church and the toaster caught on fire and set off the smoke alarms in the house. We didn't have time to deal with it or we would be late for church so we unplugged it, threw it in the bathtub and left. Not until we sat down in the pew and watched the reactions from everyone around us, did we realize we all smelt like a campfire. Nice

Jillene said...

I have never smelt like garlic for 3 days after eating a Pie Pizza--but then again I have never eaten a whold Pie Pizza either!!

Jessica said...

I love love love the Pie! I can't believe he ate a whole pizze by himself. That would kill me. Glad the smell finally went away. I didnt' realize they used so much garlic!

M-Cat said...

That is AWESOME! Can you imagine what his poop smelled like????

Annette Lyon said...

At least he enjoyed himself, right?

Rachel Sue said...

Gotta love teenage boys!

I have got to try their pizza. . .

Jessica G. said...

Another little story to tuck away for that happy occasion when CJ brings home a special young lady...
Oh, payback is sooooo much fun.

rychelle said...

when i was a little girl, i once begged my mom to let me order a twenty piece chicken mcnugget box from mcdonalds. she finally gave in, and i ate the whole box. (and that was BEFORE i was fat, but probably the reason i am fat today, now that i think about it.....)

i am definately trying that pizza the next time i'm in town!

val of the south said...

That's where we went to celebrate my husband's new job - Thank heavens we all shared a large pizza!

Congrats to him on the scouting award!

Elizabeth said...

My BIL once ate a ton of roasted garlic on Holy Saturday...The Church was Easter Sunday crowded...but they had a pew all to three pews in front free. Too funny!!!

Karen said...

I'd say you better make him get his Eagle Scout before he gets another pizza. But congrats on the Life Scout award.

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