Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Adventures in eavesdropping

Last week it was my turn to drive the Ballet carpool.

Conversation #1
(Five little girls ages 8 & 9)
Shannon: Hey I think that's my dad's truck over there.
Kritsi: No, I don't think it is.
Shannon: I think it is my dad, it looks like his truck.
Kristi: The guy driving the truck doesn't look like your dad. Is your dad Mexican?
Shannon: No, he's Californian.

Conversation #2
Kristi: I just don't know what to do about my birthday next week. We are having a big family party and I can invite one friend, but I don't know who to invite. I'm worried that when I invite only one friend, that all my other friends will find out about the party, and will feel bad that I didn't invite them.
Ashley: Um............. I think you just told us about it.
Kristi: Oops.

After listening to these girls talk for the 15 minute ride to ballet, and back home, I have made a few observations.
Observation #1:
The word "like" is used much too frequently in their conversations.
"So, like we went to this like restaurant place, and it was like really cool, cause they had like this really good food, and you could eat like all you wanted to, and it was like SO delicious, and my brother was all like "I love this food!' And he was like stuffing his face, and I was all like looking at him like all funny and like thinking that he was like so totally weird, and my mom was all like "Hey, like don't eat all that!" and I'm like thinking like he is going to be like all sick from like eating all that food, and he's like "I'm hungry" and like it's making me sick like watching him eat all that......................."

Do any of you know a doctor who might be able to perform a "likectomy"

Observation #2
My daughter could be considered a "power talker".

Conversation between my kids yesterday:

Sidenote: Aaron's idol is Don Aslett, author of "Is there life after housework", "Clean in a minute" and "Do I dust first or vacuum?"
He is also known as "America's #1 cleaning expert" Aaron wants to take over his job someday.

Aaron: Before I start my cleaning business, I want to get me some business cards.
Brielle: What would you put on them?
Aaron, Well, since Don Aslett is still America's #1 cleaning expert, my business cards should probably say "America's #2 cleaning expert."
Brielle: Are you sure you want to be Americas #2 Cleaning expert?..........#2?
You want to be an expert on cleaning up #2??????
Aaron: Hmmmmm, maybe I should put something else on them.

Conversation # 2 between my kids:

Aaron: Why is CJ's voice getting lower?
Brielle: Because he's in puverty.
Aaron: What's puverty?
Brielle: It's what happens when you grow.
Aaron: Well, then what does PU mean?
Brielle: That means that something stinks.
Aaron: I think it would be better if they called puverty "PU"

Converstion #3:

(Warning, we are starting to potty train Max, and this conversation contains some potty talk, do not read while eating)

Brielle: (Looking at Max who has mac-n-cheese all over his face) Hey Max, what did you eat for lunch?
Max: Poop!
Me: No max, you did not eat poop. That's yucky! We don't do that!
Max: Eat poop!
Brielle: No Max, poop goes in the potty.
Max: (giggle, giggle) Poop go in my mouth, (giggle) down in my tummy.
Me: No Max, remember, what do we do with poop?
Max: (giggle, giggle, giggle...) EAT IT!

Apparently I have a comedian on my hands.

Sidenote: Max DID NOT eat any poop. I checked his breath.

And finally, I will end this post with the Aaron quote of the day:

Aaron: How much does your brain weigh?
Me: I don't know, what do you think?
Aaron: Probably as much as your head without the skull.


Melissa said...

I love it... as much as your head without the skull... BRILLIANT! My son has a friend who says "dude" after every other word. "So, dude, I went and... um... dude.. I got this new skateboard dude and DUDE! It is soooo cool dude." MUST REMOVE EARS FROM HEAD NOW!

dishes and laundry said...

Puverty! As the Mom to an 11 year old boy, I can attest to the PU part. Of course he's been wearing deodorant for a couple years now - says he doesn't want to be the "stinky kid" at school.

Sue said...

I love Kristi. And I'm still a total valley girl. I KNOW I shouldn't use "Like" but I like, totally do it anyway. Totally.

b. said...

My son gets "the look" when he says, "Dude, Mom......"

Donny was on QVC yesterday. I was introduced to him twice in one day!

petersons said...

If only to be a fly on your wall! I love reading your blog. My 9 year old still say's "Stuth" instead of "stuff". It drives me mad!!!

Heidi said...

I love to eavesdrop on kids. It helps you to understand that they really do see the world in a crazy way, so why are we expecting them to behave rationally?

compulsive writer said...

Loved this! Kids are so funny.

And I love driving carpool--it's amazing the things you learn.

Tausha said...

I just found your blog while "surfing" I am not even sure how i found you, or if i could ever do again but, i love the blog, i completely relate and am thrilled that there is someone else in this universe who is "Just Like Me" Keep it up! I will check back often! From one Mom to another- You Like totally rock Dude!

Jen said...

I definitely think there could be a lucrative position for any likectomist around these parts.

JustRandi said...

I love the puverty thing. I'm definitely calling it PU from now on!

I have an award for you on my blog today!

melissious said...

Overheard this morning at my house: "I'm not a hater, I'm a lover. A game-lover. Now give me my game!" (Jake, age 4.)

Tausha said...

i know that i already left a comment but i must say Thank You for the link about your #3. I laughed out loud more than once. I am thrilled to know that the third child is maybe just supposed to be this way? I look forward to more tales from the mom who totally understands! I am sure that the next episode will happen soon enough. Check back-I'll keep you posted.

Lynne's Somewhat Invented Life said...

Very entertaining. Loved every word. Even the "poop" ones. Thanks for the laugh.

Jenera said...

I have heard some crazy stuff from teenagers and other kids in line at stores or eateries. I often think that I hope I never sounded as ridiculous as they do.

Jessica G. said...

Too funny! Listening to kids is a favorite pasttime, especially the tween girls. They are hilarious without knowing it.

Laura said...

Your post made me feel like a fly on the wall. So much fun to here the little people talk and share.


It's Just me! said...

I totally laugh with you! Kids really say the funniest things! I do however get a bit frightened at what my kids might say around other mom's etc.!!