Sunday, March 15, 2009

Hot hands, noisy milk and armpits

Tonight before Max got his pajamas on, he wanted a drink of milk.

I got a clean sippy cup out of the dishwasher, but I couldn't find a suitable lid anywhere in the kitchen. (and by suitable, I mean NOT bumpy, which is how Max describes the sippy cup lids which he has chewed on)
Finally, I looked in the refrigerator and found a sippy cup from earlier in the day which still had about 1/2" of milk left in it.

"Hey Max" I say "Here's some milk."
He looked at it, turned up his nose and said "No. I need new milk."

I explained to him that this milk was exactly the same age as the milk in the jug, but no, he wanted a new sippy cup with new milk.
I said "I'll just fill it up the rest of the way with more milk."
"NO! You not can put that milk in the old milk!"

I opened the lid and showed him "Look, the milk is fine, drink this and I'll fill it up again."
"NO! I NOT NEED THAT MILK! DUMP IT! I NEED NEW MILK!"
I then explained to him that I would not be pouring him any more milk until he drank what was already in the cup.

He gave me a grouchy look.

I put the gallon of milk back in the refrigerator.

"I NEED THE MILK! I NEED THE MILK!!"

I once more told him that all he needed to do was drink the small amount of milk, and I would give him some more.

He lifted the sippy cup to his mouth and said...


GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.


GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!


GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!

"SEE! I NOT CAN DRINK THIS MILK!! IT MAKES SOUNDS!!"

"Max, just drink it."

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!

GRRRRRRRRRRRR!!

"IT MAKING SOUNDS! THE MILK IS ALSO MAKING SOUNDS WHEN I TRY AND DRINK IT!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!! GRRRRRRRRRRR!! GRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

I am now unsuccessfully trying to suppress my laughter. (Seriously, you would laugh too if you heard milk growling at your son) This was only making Max be even grouchier.
"No Max, you will not get any more milk until you finish what is in the sippy cup."

He gave me a rather defiant look and said "I need my armpits to drink the milk"

He then picked up the oven mitts that were sitting on the kitchen counter, put them on his hands, then picked up the sippy cup.
"My hot hands are making the milk make sounds. My armpits will make the milk not be noisy."

He then proceeded to drink the milk which was now mysteriously quiet.

He sat the cup down and said "See, my armpits did make the milk quiet."

I poured the sippy cup full of milk and gave it back to him, and asked "What do you mean, your armpits made the milk quiet?"
He held up his hands, still wearing the blue oven mitts and said "SEE! MY ARMPITS!!"

Armpits,................ oven mitts...........

I guess I can see how he got the two mixed up.




Seriously, never a dull moment.................. never a dull moment.

19 comments:

Alison Wonderland said...

I honestly hope never to meet this kid because I'm sure he could not be this much fun in real life. but keep the stories coming!

amelia said...

I think I need a Max in my life.

Jessica G. said...

You should write a sitcom featuring Max-isms.

WV: sinuson
When you blow a booger out of your nose that is sooooo big, it could be your son.

Mum-me said...

Hilarious! I could clearly see it all happening, and not just because it sounds so similar to incidents we have at this house. Your style of writing is really great - I love reading your blog.

in time out said...

I LOVE THIS POST> I needed this this early monday... I think i will head off to bed...after a glass of milk of course...

Debbi said...

the milk is ALSO making growling sounds.
I am ALSO always in love with 'random alsos'.

Max is ALSO too funny.
I have armpits ALSO at my house.

Kristina P. said...

Oh, Max. What a delightful little guy.

My word verififcation is "inglishh." Looks about right.

Annette Lyon said...

Arm pits! Of course!

(Some scary milk you've got there.)

Jillene said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Max is HILARIOUS!!

Karen said...

Oh my God, I would not have been able to keep a straight face during that conversation!

Bonnie the Boss said...

Nope there never is a dull moment. Which provides you with lots of blog fodder! I just want to know how max was sure it was the milk growling and not his mom. Too funny!

Joanna said...

That is hilarious! That Max sure has one great imagination, doesn't he?

rychelle said...

tell max i am also a fan of new milk!

what a creative kid! :)

Jo said...

That kid seriously needs his own blog.

mCat said...

Hysterical! Actually, I SO get the whole mixing the old with the new

elesa said...

So funny. I guess I really can't blame him. I wouldn't drink milk that had been sitting in a cup in the fridge, but I sure as heck expect my son to!

Melinda said...

What a clever little smarty! Is it sad that I totally knew he meant oven mitts before you ever explained it? I need me some adult conversation!

elizasmom said...

See, I don't comment that much because I would pretty much say this every single time: Max is awesome. I would like him to marry Eliza so the pair of them can keep me in stitches the rest of my natural born life. The end!

WV: troons
The soundtrack to a cartoons. "Hey those troons in the latest Spongebob episode were rocking'!"

Heidi said...

That child is so precocious it's almost scary. I love him, I think.