Due to the recent clogging problems in our bathrooms, I have come up with a form that our children will be required to fill out before using the restroom.
Restroom use requisition form
Form must be completely filled out before submitting for approval.
NAME_____________________
Location of restroom requested______________
2nd choice__________
(Please remember that Mom and Dad’s bathroom is off limits.
Please do not request. You will be denied)
What will you will be using the restroom for?
(circle all that apply)
#1
#2
Other - Please explain_______________________
________________________________________
On the back of this paper, please list everything
you have eaten in the last 24 hours.
Please highlight any items that might cause constipation,
and circle all high fiber foods.
When was the last time you used the restroom?
Date_________
Time_________
Length of visit______hours______minutes
Did you have any difficulty with that particular trip?
If yes, please explain.________________________
__________________________________________
Please list the approximate amount of toilet paper
used in your last trip to the restroom.
________________squares.
Give an estimate of the amount of toilet paper
you think you will need for this next trip.
________________squares
________________rolls
Do you have a physical disability that might prevent
you from turning on the fan in the restroom?
Have you ever flushed a non flushable item?____________
If yes, please list the item, and date of the illegal flushing.
Please include a detailed essay, outlining reason why you felt the need to flush said object.
( you may use the back of this form if needed)
Are you on the restroom cleaning schedule?________
Do you have a physical disability that might prevent
you from using a plunger?
Have you ever been responsible for a clogged toilet that
resulted in the toilet spilling water onto the bathroom floor?
Please explain___________________________________
_______________________________________________
(Boys only)
Are your arms broken in such a way as to prevent you
from lifting up the toilet seat?___________
When aiming, what is your percentage of accuracy?_______%
_______________________________________________________
Please fill out the form completely.
Incomplete forms will not be processed, and will result in automatic rejection.
Submit completed forms along with two references,
and a photo ID to Mom or Dad.
(Grandma can approve if Mom or Dad are not available)
Forms will be processed on a first come first served basis.
Please plan ahead. Any accidents due to insufficient notice,
will be noted, and may result in difficulty to be approved
at a later date.
Signature of applicant_________________
____________________________________________________
For office use only:
Approved
Denied
Send to service station
Approval signature________________________
Please let me know if I forgot anything.
27 comments:
Love this. Can I steal it for my office as well?
Oh.My.Goodness!!
You are starting the year off with a HILARIOUS bang!!
This should've gone in the book.
I am such a fan!
Love it! But are you sure you can trust Grandma to be as selective in the approval process as is necessary.
Print this form off as we speak. The % of accuracy in my house is a major concern of mine!!
I am dying of laughter right now. If only they could hold it long enough to get the form filled out . . .
Oh my goodness! Considering that Chickie Girl clogged the toilet today, while we had people over to watch the game, then flushed it THREE more times, causing water to run EVERYWHERE and send Chickie Boy in a panic upstairs screaming, "WATER from the TOILET!! It's EVERYWHERE!!" Oh I'm stealing this. For. Sure.
That was PERFECT!!!! I need that at my house of teenagers.
Happy New Year!
Yep. I am copying this for my boys. I was overjoyed when I discovered they had run out of toilet paper in their bathroom. This means they are USING IT!!!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
Happy New Year!
Perhaps an outhouse is in order for kids only?
Man, you are brilliant, Jill. Most mothers would just curse their fate, but not you. Oh no, no. You are PROACTIVE.
This is hilarious. And genius. (and I like Jen's suggestion of an outhouse for the kids)
HILARIOUS!! Seriously! As the mother of all boys, there was serious training going on early in the game. I am proud to say, that the seat AND lid are put down EVER SINGLE TIME! And no one is afraid of the spray.
Good luck!!
FREAKING HILARIOUS!
Hee Hee :)
Too funny!
We stopped having clogging problems when we stopped using Charmin. That stuff just turns into giant globs in the plumbing or something.
Oh my gosh! I am not sure how I stumbled upon your blog, but I am seriously sitting at my computer with tears streaming down my face as I am reading your posts. I have NEVER laughed so hard when visiting a blog. NEVER.
Your bathroom form is brilliant. Your son, Max, may very well have a future as a music composer/lyricist.
Your profile is inspired.
Sleep is not required as a mother.
-Francesca
You are funny and mean! I love it.
That is so great! I need one created for my husband too! I was thinking about having an outhouse created just for him. His stench can clear the house:P
Hmmm....I think that was pretty darn thorough...
i love, love the "send to service station." so, so funny.
Hysterical!!!
I think you hit all the major points.
Will you be offering this form to the general public? In duplicate? Oops, I mean, two-ply. I'm thinking I may need to order a ream for household use.
Oh I'm totally putting this in our office bathroom. hahaha
This might be my most favorite post. EVER.
OMG, you made me laugh so hard I cried!
I need this form for my family. Although my 5 year old is a little ocd when it comes to the TP thing he orders anyone going in the bathroom for any reason to only use 3 squares or else. My Dad thinks you need an entire roll to wipe, and my sister tries to flush her pads so no one will know that "granny is visiting" and the aim % would be great for hubby. just add a part where the guy that leaves the seat up has to pay a fine to the person that falls in and you could sell the forms.
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