Pumpkins!

Last night at 9:30 we decided to carve our pumpkins.

We have a rule about picking out pumpkins. We tell the kids that they can have any pumpkin they want as long as they can pick it up and carry it.

Most of the kids will choose a reasonably sized pumpkin except for Aaron. He chooses the biggest one he can find, then struggles to carry it around.

We cut the tops of the pumpkins, lifted the lids and scooped out the seeds and pumpkin entrails.
When Aaron opened his, the entire inside of the pumpkin was covered with mold.

Eeeeewwwwwwwwwww.

Fortunately, we had bought an extra pumpkin so Aaron was able to carve one.

But Max was fascinated with the moldy pumpkin. He kept lifting the lid to check out the insides.
Finally, he said "That pumpkin did also poop in it's pants, it also needs to have it's cars taked away."
And yes, this was cute the first 40 or 50 times that he said it, but after that it got a little old.

I have more to write about Halloween, but I'm too tired so here's a fun video.

Enjoy!!

The cutest mermaid!!

My niece is entered in a costume contest and we would love it if you would go vote for her!

Go HERE.

Please give her a 6 star vote.








P.S. I made her costume, so a vote for her is a vote for me :0)

P.P.S. Not than I'm begging or anything, but it would really boost my self esteem.

P.P.P.S. And my niece is really cute too.

P.P.P.P.S. If you feel so inclined, you could ask all your friends and family to vote too. Cause that would be nice of you.

Just try to beat the computer

Here's a really fun game.

It's quite addicting. My kids have been playing it all day. See how many times you can beat the computer.

Go here.





HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!

Let's pretend!

Remember a while ago when I told about this great incentive program where we would pay the kids one dollar every day that their rooms were clean. It was kind of a flop because in several years we only ended up paying out $17.00.
Last week, Brielle decided that she needed some money so she cleaned her room. She did a really good job, but was quite disappointed when I told her that we were no longer paying for clean rooms.
So this week, she has been doing a great job at keeping her room clean, and is making comments such as..........

"My room has been clean now for three days, I have $3.00 in my imaginary allowance."

"I've kept my room clean now for 6 days, I'm up to $6.00 in my imaginary allowance."

And when we were at the store she said

"If I had that $8.00 from my imaginary allowance, I would buy this cute headband."
and
"If I had that $8.00 from my imaginary allowance, I would buy everyone a candy bar."

Yesterday, She said "If I had that $15.00 from my imaginary allowance, I would want to go to the store and buy a new shirt."

"$15.00?" I asked, "yesterday you only had $10.00, where did the extra imaginary $5.00 come from?"
and she answered "I watched Max for you yesterday while you went to the store, and I did such a good job that you gave me an imaginary $5.00."
So I offered to pretend to take her to the imaginary store so she can buy herself an imaginary shirt.

And while I'm at it,

I think we'll take the kids on an imaginary trip to Hawaii, and buy an imaginary new couch and loveseat for the living room, and then I can lose a bunch of imaginary weight so I can go and buy me an imaginary new wardrobe...............

Here comes the fudge! Here comes the fudge!

Due to the overwhelming, nearly unanimous vote in the comments for my last post, I made the fudge.
Some of you asked me to take pictures and give the recipe. Being nice like I am, I will do just that!

First of all you take 4 and 1/2 cups of sugar and mix in 4 Tablespoons cocoa.
The recipe doesn't say to mix the sugar and the cocoa first, so I suppose that you could just throw all of the ingredients in together and mix them up if that's really the way you like to do things, however, I find that if you do it my way, it's easier to get the clumps out of the cocoa.


(Please take note of how ambidextrous I am being. I am stirring with my right hand while taking a picture with my left. Please be impressed, I am right handed, and this was not as easy as it looks) (and yeah, I realize that I probably spelled that word wrong. It's 11:52 p.m. right now, and I'm just too darn tired to look it up to see how to spell it correctly, so please just deal with it. )


Next, mix in one large can of evaporated milk and one cube of margerine. Please note, I prefer butter, because it just tastes better. I guess that you could use margerine, but then your fudge won't taste as good as mine and you might have self esteem issues.


Due to the fact that I have one child that thinks that she doesn't like nuts, I've decided to be ultra cool mom, and make some fudge with nuts, and some without. See the cute little divider that I cleverly made out of the left over tin foil from my foil hats that I will be selling in my Esty shop. You know, the ones that will prevent the mind controlling electromagnetic waves from getting to your brain.
Pre order them now. They will make great Christmas gifts! I can monogram them too, but that will add an extra week to the production time.


Back to the fudge. Heat and boil it 7-8 minutes, stirring constantly. I boiled this for 8 minutes, and I probably should have stopped at 7.


Now this part is very important. Listen carefully.

When stirring your fudge DO NOT SCRAPE THE SIDE OF THE PAN!!!!!

Don't ask me why, I think it's supposed to keep it from going grainy, and help it to have a nice smooth texture. I learned this from a friend of mine whose husband is a Chef at the Lion House, so she should know what she's talking about.

(If you'll notice in this picture I've completely given up on trying to stir with my right hand while taking pictures with my left. After I nearly dropped the camera into the boiling hot fudge, I decided that I should probably hold the camera in my right hand, Besides, the camera strap kept getting in the picture and it was really stressing me out.)


After boiling for 7-8 minutes (again, I think I boiled it too long) Remove from the heat and stir in 1 cup of chocolate chips.

This is where everything went HORRIBLY WRONG, because in the recipe, I had written 1-2 bag of chocolate chips which I took to mean between one and two bags of chocolate chips which really seemed like a lot to me so I just dumped in one bag. Apparently, I should have trusted my instincts because after talking to my mom today, it was supposed to be 1/2 of a bag, or approximately 1 cup.

NOT THE ENTIRE BAG OF CHOCOLATE CHIPS!!!




Anyway, at this point, instead of the chips melting nicely and the fudge turning creamy and smooth, the chocolate chips stuck together and the fudge got REALLY stiff and hard to stir.
I finally got all the chips melted into the mixture, but I still had a 16 ounce bag of mini marshmallows to stir in to the fudge!!!
(also, I took some time out to snap a quick picture of the chocolate chips to show you what they look like before they are all melted. Those few seconds might have cost me dearly)

At this point, I enlisted the help of my very strong hubby who put on the oven mitts and held on to the hot pan while I dumped the marshmallows in the fudge and started stirring.

And stirring.......



and stirring.......



and stirring.

Eventually, I got the darn marshmallows all mixed in but it was still kind of lumpy. (Sorry I didn't have any pictures of this part, but I was stirring with both hands while DH was holding the pan still, and quite frankly, I was getting a little onery about the whole thing)

I dumped some of the fudge in the pan, then added 1 cup of chopped pecans to the rest and stirred some more...........


(Now if I were Kristina, I might have thrown in a jar of bacon bits too)
Then I dumped the rest into the other side of the pan.


The pan was very heavy. Aaron was taking the pictures at this point. I had to use both hands. Notice the blue oven mitts? They are the ones featured here.


So, I'm not sure if it was because I cooked the fudge too long, or if it was because I used too many chocolate chips, but the fudge just didn't turn out as good as usual.



OK *Mary* you might have been right about what you said about fudge in your comment on my last post.

In a last act of desperation, I tried to smooth it out, thinking that it might actually look better.

Left side no nuts, right side nuts.

Let's just pretend that it looks like that because the lighting is bad, OK?


Now it should be common knowledge that anything left sticking to the inside of the pan belongs to the person who made it.

And I'm pretty sure that this part doesn't have any calories in it either.


Now here's a nice tasty chunk-o-fudge!! No comments *Mary* I promise it tasted really good.

Here is the finished product on a plate. Delicious!!!

While it was still warm, it was nice and creamy, but by morning, I was chipping it apart with a knife. But as I said before, it smelled good and it tasted good, and quite frankly, it was my reason for getting out of bed this morning.

And the kids liked it. In fact, they may or may not have had it for breakfast.



And I may or may not have used it as bribery incentive for Max to get dressed today.

And to clean up his toys.

And to stop whining.

And to sing my favorite songs.

Actually, I was feeling a bit like I was raising a trained seal.

"Here Max" as I'm holding the fudge over his head "sing a song for mommy! Come on Max, sing. Sing! SING!"

And then about 100 times today I got to hear him say "I ALSO DO NEED SOME MORE OF DAT STUFF!!"


My conclusion on the fudge. I should have only used one half of a bag of chocolate chips, and only boiled it for 7 minutes.

Still, it did satisfy my chocolate craving............

(and no, I didn't weigh myself to see how much weight I might have gained.)

I will now give you the recipe as long as you don't tell my mom that I gave it to you.


Fudge recipe

4 1/2 cups sugar
4 Tablespoons cocoa
1 cube margerine or butter (USE BUTTER!)
1 large can of evaporated milk

Heat and boil 7-8 minutes (7!) stirring constantly!
Remove from heat and stir in 1/2 bag of chocolate chips
Stir in 1 pint of marshmallow creme OR one 16 ounce bag of mini marshmallows.

Stir until dissolved
(or until your husband gets tired of holding the pan so you can stir with both hands)

Add one cup of chopped nuts then stir until creamy.

Variation on this recipe- leave out cocoa, use white chocolate chips, and add almond flavoring after it has boiled.

The trouble with fudge

So,
I'm sitting here, valiantly fighting the urge to go and make myself a great big batch of fudge.

Homemade fudge with pecans.

My mom's recipe. So good!

"So what's the dilema?" you ask? "What's wrong with fudge especially if it's your mom's super-de-duper delicious recipe?"

Well, I'll tell you what's wrong with it. It's magical fudge. It's addictive.
It's impossible to just eat one piece!

And did I mention how wonderfully delicious it is?

Did I also mention that I've been craving chocolate all weekend? And not just my ordinary chocolate cravings that can be satisfied by chocolate chips.

NO!

It's a "I need to have chocolate in the form of fudge!!" sort of craving.

The recipe makes five pounds of fudge.

FIVE POUNDS!!

This is the fudge that I make and give to the neighbors for Christmas. Only, the neighbors don't get all of it.

Here's a question. I always make a five pound batch of fudge, and I never eat the whole five pounds. (shut up, I seriously couldn't eat ALL of the fudge) Why do I gain TEN pounds every time I make a batch of fudge?
I think that's proof that the fudge has some magical properties to it.

What I don't understand is why something that tastes so absolutely good can be so bad for me.

Somehow, it just seems so wrong.

Maybe I could market it as "Magical fudge, feed it to your skinny enemies!"

I really like that idea, because if I manage to make everyone around me fatter, it would totally make ME look thinner wouldn't it?

Seriously, you would think that the Diet Dr. Pepper I drink with the fudge would somehow cancel out the calories and carbs and everything else.

I'm rambling, I know.

I'll put it up to a vote. Leave me a comment telling me whether or not I should make the fudge and why. Somehow, leaving it up to mycyber BFFs will make me feel less irresponsible.

p.s. In a chocolate craving moment of weakness, I bought a bag of Hershey's kisses. We discovered that Max will do pretty much anything to get a chocolate kiss.
ANYTHING!!
This information will come in handy at a future time, I'm sure.
Mwhahahahahah!

Because I'm SO grateful

Dear lady who volunteers in my daughter's class,
Thank you so much for taking time out of your busy day to come and teach the children about politics.
I would, however, be most grateful if you would only teach the children about the political system, and leave your personal opinions to yourself.
While I agree that it is a good thing for the children to know various things about each of the candidates, from what I hear, you said wonderful, glowing things about one candidate, while getting in nasty little jabs at the other.
I'm sure you felt very proud of yourself at the end of the discussion when all of the children said that they would all vote for your candidate. Why would they do anything different when you portrayed him as a superhero and his opponent as the village idiot.
I honestly don't care which candidate you support, I just feel that in this situation you should give each candidate an equal amount of praise, and let the children decide for themselves.
A public school classroom is not a place to recruit junior members of your political party.
Thank you.
Signed,
A really annoyed mom.
P.S. Don't be surprised if you wake up tomorrow morning with signs for the other candidate scattered throughout your yard.




Dear seller on eBay,
Thank you so much for your email reminding me to pay for the item that I won. I apologize, but I don't seem to remember even bidding on that item, and quite frankly, I can't imagine what I was thinking when I bid on it mostly because a 50 acre island in the South Pacific is very large, and I'm sure I wouldn't be able to fit it in the basement with the rest of the junk that I've bought on eBay.
Due to the fact you sent me that reminder and threatened to give me negative feedback and turn me in as a non-paying bidder, I will go ahead and pay for the item. I don't exactly have the money right now, but if you could be patient, any day now I should be receiving a large sum of money from a Nigerian Prince and will be able to pay you in full.
It was so nice of you to include all of those links in your email which led me directly to the eBay sign in page where I could enter all of my personal information so it would be easier for me to pay.
Thank you.
Signed,
Do you really think I'm that gullible? Seriously? A 50 acre island in the South Pacific????
P.S. Just so you know, eBay does not seem to have any record of this transaction, and you are listed as "no longer a registered user" You might want to check into that, I'm sure it's just a computer glitch somewhere in the eBay system.
P.P.S. Does the island have it's own airport?




Dear guy on the freeway,
I'm so sorry that we were in your way earlier today when you suddenly decided to change lanes. You see, we were unaware that you were changing lanes until AFTER you nearly ran into the front of our car.
Might I suggest that when wanting to change lanes that you use your signal before you do. Please understand that if you use the turning signal after you finish changing lanes it doesn't really count.
I'm sure that you didn't see our large SUV there because you were concentrating on the stack of papers that you were holding on the front of the steering wheel while talking on your cell phone.
I'm sorry that we interrupted your obviously very important phone call.
Signed,
PULL OF THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!




Dear Max,
Please stop asking me what "those" are. Please stop poking them and asking "What those are?"
Especially when we are waiting in the long check-out line at the grocery store.
You know darn well what "those" are, I fed you with them for two years!
Signed,
Your no longer lactating mom.

Only read this post if you think Max is also completely adorable, and also you want to hear even more clever things that he has also said.........also

Saturday, I had the privilege of attending Kristina's Meet-n-greet at the Olive Garden.
The lunch was so fun, I really enjoyed meeting some fellow bloggers in person.
I can't wait until we can get together again!

Over the last few days, Max has done some incredibly cute things. (I can't remember all of them because I'm getting older and my brain is filling up, and I just don't have all of the space available for storage in there like I used to, and unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be up to me to decide what I do and don't remember and so I usually end up remembering completely useless information like my friends locker combination from seventh grade, but I can't remember what I ate for lunch today. Or even IF I ate lunch today)

Here are some I do remember. (OK, I only remember them because I wrote them down)

Max comes up to me and points at my chin. He asks "What's that?"
I decide to joke with him and say "I think it's my elbow."
He shakes his head and says "No, it's the part that holds up your mouth."




Max: "Mom, do I have hippos?"
Me: "Hippos? Do you mean like a hippopotamus?
Max: "No, like this!"
(he begins to dance)
"You put your right hippo in, you put your right hippo out, you put your right hippo in and then you shake it all about..............."



I think that Max is quite extraordinary because at age three, he knows his right hand from his left.
So of course I like to use this to tease him.

Me: "Max, which hand is your left hand?"
Mas raises his left hand.
Me:"Good, now which hand is your right hand?"
Max raises his right hand.
Me: "Now which hand is your wrong hand?"
Max: "WITH I NOT HAVE THREE HANDS! I ONLY HAVE ALSO TWO HANDS!"

I stand corrected.



Just in the last few days, Max has decided that he needs to use more than one also in a sentence, as in............
"Mom, I ALSO, ALSO, ALSO need you to ALSO get me some milk."
(seriously, he has also said that like also 8 times today!)



And my most very favorite Max quote of the last few days....
(drumroll please........)

Max: "Mom, your hair is messed up."
He then looks at me disapprovingly and says...........
"You also need to have it look better."

I also agree.

Conversations with a three year old

So, it's almost 2:00 a.m. and I'm still awake. Apparently, a diet Coke after 10:00 is not a good idea.

Today, we had some interesting conversations with Max.

#1.
Me: "Max, I thought I buttoned the buttons on your shirt. Why are they undone now? Did you unbutton them?"

Max: "Yes I did, because they were also FREAKING ME OUT!!"


#2.
Brielle: "Max, I'm going to help you clean up your puzzle, O.K.?"

Max: "No! Do you want me to FLIP OUT? I also going to FLIP OUT!"

#3
(I sit in the rocking chair with Max every night, and sing to him before he goes to bed. We have a glider rocker with a gliding ottoman.
Earlier in the day Max had moved the ottoman around so that it moved side to side instead of back and forth with the rocking chair.
I had the nerve to move it back.)

Max: "No, it also can't be that way! IT'S FREAKING IT OUT! THE OTTOMAN IS ALSO FREAKING OUT!"

(I think he's spending way too much time under the influence of his older siblings.)

Earlier today, Max was starting in with the questions again, and so I tried another tactic.

Max: "Why is this a stool?"
Me: "Why do you think it's a stool?"
Max: (Looking at me like I'm a complete moron) "Because it's a stool."

(duh!)

If only I had known earlier that it was that easy. At least now I know how to answer him.

On a lighter note, we had a bit of a victory today :0)

Max ate a vegetable!

O.K. it was just a small piece of lettuce and he did say that he liked it, however, he wouldn't eat any more, but hey, we need to start somewhere!

Max's new word

(actual quotes from Max over the weekend)


"Why is this your computer?"

"Why is this a band-aid?"

"Why is this Grandma's house?"

"Why is this a Spongebob shirt?"

"Why is this Spongebob?"

"Why is this a sweater?"

"Why is this a sandwich?"

"Why is this my milk?"

"Why can these be my shoes?"

"Why is this the clock?"

"Why is this another clock?"

"Why is this the TV?"

"Why is this also our car?"

"Why is it put gas in the car?"

"Why is this the floor?"

"Why is those are pens?"

"Why are these my blocks"

After listening to Max for the last few days, I have come up with a new response to his questions.

"I don't know honey, why don't you go ask Daddy?"

Reason 864 for why I'm so tired

The nine o'clock news has begun it's beginning.
The sun, it has long ago set.
The children are dressed in pajamas and slippers
But they can't go to bed...right just yet.

For they suddenly remember some tasks still undone,
that need to be finished tonight.
For some homework and projects are still incomplete,
it's a serious, sorrowful plight!

Earlier today, they claimed they were finished,
homework to do, there was not.
"Why didn't you do it earlier?" I asked.
And their answer "I simply forgot."

The math, OH THE MATH! It still needs to be done,
and I told them to start it directly.
Fractions and decimals and multiplications,
all deciphered and written correctly.

Only one project more for my young son to do,
One last project was left to be done.
A simple machine, a pulley with string,
and to make it, he thought would be fun.

He gathered the stuff that he knew he would need,
to finish his project quite nicely.
A shoe box he found and some string and a spool,
and a hanger cut rather precisely.

Then my youngest, my sweet little tot came to me,
and tried to climb into my lap.
("Why is he still up this late?" do you ask?
my answer, "A three hour nap!")

(and yes, I did know that I shouldn't have let him sleep that long, but I was just getting so much done, and it was so quiet, and he had been really cranky, and quite frankly, I didn't really think about the fact that he wouldn't be ready to go back to sleep at 9:00)

He's carrying a book that he wants me to read,
about pigs eating berries and cream.
I told him "Please wait, in a minute" I said,
And then from him, I heard a loud scream.

My other son looked distressed, and concerned
for the wire wouldn't stay in it's place.
"How can I make this stay put?" he did ask,
with a frustrated look on his face.

"Use the tape!" I declared, "It's inside of the drawer!"
Said the child "Oh no, it is not,
I already looked, there's no tape to be found,
it must be in some other spot."

I walked to the drawer, and I opened it wide,
with my tantruming tot right behind.
I reached down inside and pulled out the tape,
that my other son just couldn't find.

Then I took my cross tot, and I read him the book,
(and I read it to him really fast)
Then I sang him a song, and tucked him into his bed,
where he yawned and looked tired (AT LAST!)

Then my evening was over, the kids were in bed
each one of them sound asleep as a log.
And instead of me getting the rest that I need,
I wrote a poem about it on my blog.