A few nights ago as I was getting Max ready for bed, he started wincing and grabbed his elbow. He was quite agitated and kept looking at his bedroom door and saying "Oh no! Oh no!"
Me: "What's wrong Max?"
Max: "The monsters are also
getting me!"
Me: "Max, there aren't any monsters here."
Max: "Yes there are! Big scary monsters!"
Me: "What color are they?"
Max: "Purple!"
Me: "Well then you don't need to worry, purple monsters are nice, it's the green monsters that are mean."
Max: "THEY'RE GREEN! THEY'RE GREEN! THEY'RE ALSO GREEN!"
I reach into my pocket, take out an imaginary can of monster repellent and hand it to Max.
"Here Max, spray this on the monsters and they will go away."
Max has had the monster repellent in his pocket for the last few days. Periodically we will hear "Psssssssssssss" as Max is spraying the imaginary monster repellent on the monsters.
Or on his siblings if thy start to bug him too much.
Tonight as I was helping Max into his pajamas, the monsters returned.
Max: "They're getting me! They're getting me! The monsters are also getting me! Now they're also getting our garbage! The monsters are getting into our garbage cans! The monsters are eating our garbage!"
Me: "Well Max, if they get in those big cans and start eating our garbage, the lids will close on them and they won't be able to get out, then Tuesday on garbage day the garbage truck will come and take away the monsters and they will never bother you again."
Max: "Will the green monsters go in the recycle can and will the purple monsters also go in the blue garbage can?"
I told him yes because the recycle can sounded like an appropriate place for the "green" monster.
Then Max said "What day is it today? Is it also Saturday?"
I decide to tease him a bit and I say "No, I think it's Valentines day."
Max: "No, it's also Saturday."
Me: "Or maybe it's President's day."
Max: "NO! It's Saturday!"
Me: "Or possibly St. Patrick's day?"
Max: "NO! It's also SAT. UR. DAY!"
Me: "Memorial day, that's it, I'm pretty sure it's Memorial day."
Max: "NO! With it not also be that! School is closed today! It's Saturday!"
Me: "School IS closed on Memorial Day. I'm pretty sure it's Memorial day."
I could tell I was about to cross the line as Max started to say "NO! IT ALSO IS SATURDAY!"
I said "Hey Max, do you want a cookie?"
Max stops for a moment, immediately calms down and says "OK."
Chocolate chip cookies. The bringer of peace.
14 comments:
Umm, Jill?
You're just as full of it as Max is.
He comes by it naturally.
Oh that is so cute! I'll have to remember to pick me up some of that monster repellent.
You are so mean! (types the woman who is currently ignoring her hungry children)
Bby monster repellant, do you mean Chacon?
Tormenting the poor baby. Actually, I like the idea of monsters eating garbage. I like that Max doesn't like the idea. Such a child. His brain makes me giggle.
I get distrated by chocolate chip cookies too :)
It is amazing the power one little cookie can hold.
I am sure that the green monsters go into the green can. Quick thinking on your part! I am impressed.
HAHAHAHA!! That's GREAT!!
Cookies tend to distract me from everything too. In fact, I have to go now since there is a batch in the oven:) YUM!
There's a lot of imaginary stuff at your house. You do have, you know, real stuff too. Right?
Haha... green monsters in the recycling can...
Smart, an imaginary monster repellent, to match the imaginary keys and the imaginary christmas presents (which you will buy with imaginary money I presume?)
Chocolate chip cookies and monster spray... I think you may have found the secret to world peace.
I'm with b. He truly does get it honestly! You are a hoot, woman!
Maybe this is why the keys were so crucial - the keys lock up the monsters!
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